So my husband and I decided once a month that we will be going on another honeymoon. This past weekend was our second honeymoon and we spent it at Manhattan Beach, Long Beach, Venice Beach, and Burbank. It was the most fun I’ve had in a while. The fact that our entire trip was less than what we would blow at a casino is even better. I am so thankful that we have the ability to do things like this. The entire trip was very adventurous. We didn’t know where we were going to end up hotel wise or in what city and it was so wonderful. Doing stuff like that was how my life used to be before becoming a mom and getting married.
Wake up everyday look in the mirror and tell yourself your beautiful without make up with bed head and pjs. Tell yourself you are unstoppable. You can can accomplish whatever your heart desires. Realize no matter what you’re going through you really never alone no matter how alone you feel. Do something you like, once liked, or love to do. Realize you have a purpose and no matter how much it feels like the world is crashing down on you there is always a way out that is in no way self destructive or life ending. If the reason you are so down and feel like the world is caving in on you is because of who you are with then it’s high time you sit their ass down and discuss ever little detail about what can be done to make your life better. If nothing can be resolved it’s time to weed them out. You may not be happy anymore but you can be. There is always a solution no matter how incredibly hard it seems to admit it or see it at the time. Breathe. You can do it. You will make it. You are strong. You are beautiful. Don’t ever let yourself fall victim to negativity ever. Feeling ugly and worthless is not acceptable nor a way to just accept that’s how your life is going to be forever. Change starts with you. Find out where, what, how, and who can be the reason and go from there.
I will be doing all of these things from here on out. I’m tired of feeling worthless, ugly, depressed, constantly anxious, fat, and stuck in a rut. I used to have all the confidence in the world. Then slowly as my life started to fall into place perfectly everything else started to fall out of whack. I have constant migraines now, my hair has fallen out, I’ve put on weight, constantly need Xanax just to function, and struggle with getting out of bed on a daily basis. I’m 23. I’m supposed to be enjoying my life to the fullest not wanting to crawl in a hole and die. It’s time to reevaluate what I want in my life and how I’m going to get to where I need to be.
Remember you are not the only problem. Everyone is a contributing factor in how you feel about yourself and your life on a daily basis.
I’m hoping that this can be helpful to others. Tonight was the worst I’ve ever felt and I hope to never be at this point again. I hope everyone who is combating depression and anxiety can gain something from this as well.